What are you afraid of?

 

What are you afraid of? Lord you have to be kidding might have been our response to Jesus if we were one of the apostles.  Consider that the apostles were skilled fishermen who find themselves caught in the storm of their lives; their boat is about to capsize, and despite their experience, they are unable to take control and naturally fear for their lives. And there's Jesus, who has done marvelous, miraculous things on behalf of others, sleeping in the bow of the boat.

In our Gospel, (Mark4: 35-41), it’s hard to imagine that Jesus’ response was not rhetorical: "Quiet! Be still! Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?"

We know that parables were used by Jesus to get his listeners and us to think beyond the literal and expand our frame of reference, and perhaps shake us up a bit. This story while not necessarily a parable, certainly fits the bill. It does shake us up a bit. How would we have behaved as characters in this story? How would we have responded to Jesus’ question? What would it be like to rely on our faith in the midst of an overwhelming crisis, and in the apostles’ case, incapacitating fear?

Have you ever felt powerless to control and take charge of a serious life-impacting situation? I can recall a number of times when I was confronted with having to make decisions that I knew would alter mine and my family’s lives forever. These were not easy and my options were very limited. In all cases, fear of the unknown resulted in feeling  powerless and helpless. There was no place to hide and no one to whom I could turn. It was on me.

Fear or suffering gets us to a place in which our nerves are raw and exposed and that place between us and the bottom is very thin. This thin place seems to activate the "semi-permeable membrane" that serves as a barrier between us and God. We find God waiting when we are  at the end of our rope. If we are open and receptive, we will eventually hear his voice or feel his prompting and finally be able to overcome our immobility, and  begin to move.  It may take minutes, days, weeks…or even years.

Jesus’ lesson for his apostles in the midst of the storm is to trust in God. You can almost hear Hammerstein's lyrics in "You'll Never Walk Alone." The storm will pass and we will “somehow” manage to make it through, albeit different from the way in which we “entered.” We will be transformed in some way, with greater insight and inner experience of God.

Albert Nolan paraphrases Augustine when he writes that “God is closer to me than I am to myself. God is one with me and with you…If God is closer to me than I am to myself and we are in some profound sense one, then I have nothing to fear. I will be cared for at all times and in all circumstances. Nothing can really harm me and whatever happens will be for the best. I am loved beyond measure because I am one with the whole mystery of life.” ( Jesus Today, A Spirituality of Radical Freedom. p 143)